Subject: October 19th, 2004

(possible future news clip???)...

New York - AP 10-19-2004
To date, President George Bush successfully capturing Saddam Hussein, capturing Osama Bin Laden, uncovering thousands of Iraqi weapons of mass destruction, and exposing a detailed and plausible conspiracy between Saddam and Osama to set off a "dirty nuke" in downtown New York.

But Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry was quick to point out that, "not only does the real threat, North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il, remain in power, but the scandalous truth is that George Bush is understandably ashamed to come out and admit he cannot run over 100 miles per hour OR dodge bullets, like Neo in the Matrix. Is THIS the man we want for our next President?!?"